I have built up a new life with my lesbian lover, Mulan. We are One against the world.
I mean, we snog, and go to bed together and everything! But it's not the same as with a chap, really, is it?
And when I suggested we Do It in front of the mirror, Mulan positively did her nut! "We're not into that macho pervert shit!"
(But I am!)
(But I am!)
And she's absolutely beastly to Mama and Papa - considering she lives with us, and eats all our food and everything. Mind you, Papa going on about Chairman Mao does not help!!!
I think the last straw really came when Lord Posh suggested a jolly threesome, or a floorshow at the very least. I didn't mean to giggle, but Mulan absolutely stormed out. She could be a bit on the bossy side really.
I think the last straw really came when Lord Posh suggested a jolly threesome, or a floorshow at the very least. I didn't mean to giggle, but Mulan absolutely stormed out. She could be a bit on the bossy side really.
Anyway, this pal of Poshie's, Madonna, has suggested I live with her. She's sort of old and has this funny kind of look in her eye. But she tells me I'd adore her house in Notting Hill.
What to do? Oh, what to do?!!!!